


Bittersweet

by kakeinei



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Historical, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-02
Updated: 2015-07-20
Packaged: 2018-04-02 11:58:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4059160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kakeinei/pseuds/kakeinei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mei took a sip. Too bitter, she decided. The tangy after taste of the matcha lingered on her tongue, a harsh reminder of the empty hole in her heart. The tea, she realized, was not so different from Honda Kiku himself. Strong, pungent and bitter, with a green so deep she could not see the depths of the cup, the tea was an ironic reflection of her captor.</p>
<p>Set after 1895 when Taiwan was under Japanese rule.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mei

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my first work posted on this site, but some of you may have noticed that I have the same story posted on ff.net as I am active on both accounts!! I will be sure to update both sites regularly!

On the battlefield, there was no difference between good or evil. People either attacked for power, wealth and women, or they defended against power, wealth and women. As far as Mei could tell, not even the innocent were truly uninvolved; there were always those who hid under the façade of the weak, helpless commoner, yet those hearts were often the darkest, tainted with deception and lies. Then there were the traitors, those hateful, despicable beings who abandoned the trust and expectations of others. Mei held them in contempt. But then again, maybe she was one herself. It was all too complicated and confusing; the types of people out in the world and whatnot, and Mei had long ago decided that there was no difference between them. Despite her conclusions, Mei found herself fascinated with all the corruption and immorality of humans, and held onto the shred of faith that there was still hope in humanity.

Mei took a sip. Too bitter, she decided. She missed the clean, refreshing taste of oolong tea, and wished for more than anything to be back in her home. The tangy after taste of the matcha lingered on her tongue, a harsh reminder of the empty hole in her heart. The tea, she realized, was not so different from Honda Kiku himself. Strong, pungent and bitter, with a green so deep she could not see the depths of the cup, the tea was an ironic reflection of her captor. She took a sip, then another, until she realized that she was gulping the tea down, earning a disapproving look from her maidservant, Shouko. She didn't care. The liquid burned down her throat, tears stinging her eyes, yet she didn't stop. Such little pain was nothing compared to the suffering of her people. It was the least she could do to ease her guilt.

"Mei-san, tea should not be gulped down. It is very unladylike. One should drink it slowly, in order to appreciate and taste the wonderful flavors," Shouko chided. She was a middle aged woman of broad shoulders and a sharp tongue, graying hair pulled back tightly into a bun that gave away her age. Her straight brows framed a pair of dull brown eyes that had seen too much sorrow and suffering to dwell on any lingering emotions in this world. Mei wondered if she would become like her; a hollow, empty shell of a woman, glorious days of youth all lost in the despair and misery of war.

Mei said nothing, only set the cup down with a soft thud against the table. Even the sounds were dull in this country. Nothing here could compare with the vibrant colors that surrounded her home, majestic mountains that towered above the city, and emerald green plains that stretched before her eyes, reaching no end until they touched the clouds on the horizon.

Shouko huffed at her indifference, and snatched her cup way. "Best learn your manners before Honda-san comes," she warned, rising from her position knelt on the floor. The screen door shut with a loud snap, and Mei was left by herself once again.

She fingered her hair. The once dark silky locks that shone under sunlight were now dry and lifeless, with split ends and a plain, dark brown color. It was funny; the effect sorrow had on humans. It not only affected the heart, but the physical being as well. She lay down on the cold tatami floor, trying to rid her mind of the devastating memories etched in her mind, but all she saw behind closed eyes was blood, blood and blood. Blood the color of red roses, a symbol of love and affection, but only reminded her of the loved ones she lost. Choking back a cry, she covered her ears with her hands in an attempt to block out her surroundings. Suddenly the chirping of a bird sounded like the dreadful screams begging for mercy, and at once Mei was transported back into the past.

Red. Red everywhere. Red on the brick walls of buildings, in murky puddles down the streets of innocent blood shed, in the hungry flames lapping at what was remained of the ruined city. Terrified screams filled the air as children were torn from their mothers, distraught cries as husbands were taken captive, dragged away from their families. Smoke filled the air, choking everyone, with tears running their cheeks, either from the smoke or despair, it was impossible to tell. Amidst the chaos, Mei was miraculously calm. Perhaps it was from the sheer loathing she felt for the Japanese, for her eyes burned with fury. Fury directed at Wang Yao, whom she trusted as a brother, the man who raised her as a child and taught her so many things. Fury directed at the Japanese as well, the source of all this chaos and destruction.

The rest of the events passed in a blur; Mei vaguely remembered being lead to a ship, and a man introducing himself as Honda Kiku. He was to be her caretaker, she was told, and to treat him with the same respect she held for Yao. But the respect was long gone, ever since he had handed her over to Japan. As she slowly walked down the dock, she looked into a pair of dark, emotionless eyes. They were the color of the night, every bit as ominous and cold, empty of any feeling or emotion. They seemed to swallow her up whole until she saw nothing, drowning in the obsidian abyss of desolation. And then she was falling, falling into pure blackness, with the sound of the wind rushing through her ears and the feeling of hands grabbing at her as she fell through emptiness. Mei opened her mouth in a silent scream, arms flailing wildly as she reached blindly for something, someone to hang onto for support.

"Mei?"

Mei's eyes flew open with a start. Mind still reeling from her nightmare, she groaned as she slowly took in her unfamiliar surroundings, vision still foggy from sleep. A single candle burned, the only source of light in the dark room. Rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand, she looked around for the source of the voice that had rescued her from the traumatizing dream.

"Who's there?" Her voice sounded odd and frightened, bouncing off the walls and echoing around the empty room. It was scarcely furnished, with the traditional bamboo flooring and plain screen doors. A lonely table sat in the corner, with a sad branch of chrysanthemum drooping dejectedly from the vase. It reminded her too much of the stoic, impassive man that trapped her in this horrible place. The only part Mei didn't despise about the room was the screen door that lead to the garden she sought comfort in, her only corner of solace.

There was no reply. Only the sound of the wind rustling through the trees, and the occasional barking of a guard in the distance could be heard. Uneasy and slightly embarrassed at whoever had stumbled across her nightmare, Mei sat up and brushed a hand through her tangled locks. Her eyes caught sight of something.

On the opposite side of the room, where the screen door opened to the halls, something pink lay on the floor. Filled with curiosity, Mei crawled across the room on her hands and slowly inspected the object. It was a cherry blossom, freshly picked from a branch, as the single leaf attached was still green and smelled of fresh grass. Holding the flower close, Mei breathed in the faint scent, the petals tickling her nose. I wonder who left it here, she thought to herself. It couldn't have been Shouko, for she never disturbed her after tea was served, and the grouchy woman wasn't one to display affection with such romantic tasks. Puzzled and slightly troubled, Mei set the flower next to her hair ornaments. The plum blossoms were the only items Mei had left of her hometown, and she had fought hard to keep them.

When Mei had first arrived in Japan, the women had forced her to adapt to Japanese fashion and customs, including removing her hair ornaments. She had refused; the plum blossom was the national flower of Taiwan, and handing them in meant giving up the one piece of home left for her. Her stubbornness had resulted in a heated argument between the servants, until a disgruntled Honda stormed in and demanded them to let Mei keep her flowers, who looked up at him with wide, surprised eyes. That was the first act of kindness he had shown her. Or maybe he was just irritated with the fuss and wanted to solve the silly dispute quickly.

Now dried up and shriveled, Mei had set them on a shelf, checking each day to ensure they were safe from prying hands.

Mei slowly opened the back screen door, quietly as not to disturb anyone who was asleep. The faint glow of the moon greeted her as she breathed in the cool night air, the faint sound of crickets chirping reaching her ears. Looking up at the twinkling stars, she thought about her hometown, if everyone was still struggling to get by, unknown to the fact that just a few rooms away, a certain Japanese young man was staring at the same stars.


	2. Injured

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Mei is injured and Honda struggles with his manly composure.

Although the servants never mistreated or brought about any physical harm to Mei, the isolation and loneliness was enough to resurrect the empty void in her heart that swallowed and overwhelmed her with guilt, to the extent that she stopped eating her meals and refused to leave her room. In fact, she was all too aware of how they would approach her timidly as if she were an untamed beast, the pitiful glances cast discreetly in her direction, and the whispers behind her back, of how much trouble she caused for the Honda household and their master. She confined herself to her chamber, and did not respond to anyone.

  
Childish rebellion, as Shouko called it, and reassured the rest that in no time she would return to her former self.  
Yet her behaviors carried on until news of her illness spread to Honda, who upon hearing her condition, abandoned the task at hand at once and headed home.

As the seasons transitioned from spring to the scorching hot sun of summer, it would be two more weeks before Mei saw Honda Kiku again, and three more until her nightmares gradually withdrew from their nightly torture. Mei was witness to the blooming flowers that transformed into ripe, juicy fruit, and the never ending stream of wounded soldiers constantly entering the house, the only source of news of the world beyond the gates that were always locked. She often found herself wandering through the grounds of Honda-san’s residence, which resembled a maze of screen doors and gardens, the never ending corridors twisting this way and that. It was during one of these occasions, that Mei stumbled across Honda Kiku’s private quarters.

  
“That’s odd, I remember passing by this painting before,” a confused and terribly lost Mei wondered aloud. The crisscrossing hallways and nearly identical paintings did little to help the Taiwanese girl, who was currently in a dilemma, struggling to find the way back to her room. Catching sight of a screen door identical to the one that led to her room, Mei breathed out a relieved sigh as she pulled it open.

  
A gust of wind greeted her as she opened the door, and the sudden stream of sunlight blinded her momentarily before she was able to adjust her eyes to the brightly lit room. Taking a step back in surprise at the sight before her eyes, she could not contain her shock as she exclaimed, “Oh! I’m so sorry!” before she realized she was addressing the very master of the house, and her current captor.

  
Honda Kiku sat at his desk, pen in hand. The harsh sun glared behind him, making it hard to see his face against blinding light. Mei stared at his silhouette, and wondered what his facial expression was at the current moment, or if he even had an expression on his face.

  
As the curtain of clouds shifted and covered the sun, the realization dawned in her eyes and she slowly registered the fact that up until now the Japanese man not uttered a single word, only regarding her with those cold, black eyes she loathed so much. It was unnerving.

  
“I apologize for intruding,” Mei immediately changed her tone; eyes cast respectively downward, slightly afraid to meet his hard gaze. The foreign Japanese language felt strange on her tongue. “I did not realize that this was your private quarters,” Mei glanced up and added after a second of thought, “as I have not seen you since the day we met.”  
Her once fiery personality had been bottled up inside her for months, and the fire that had once burned bright inside her tiny yet strong soul had diminished to a faint flicker, overpowered by the suffocating presence of the Japanese. Yet however overwhelming his demeanor may be, it was never enough to extinguish her spirit.

  
If Honda Kiku had any reaction to her bold statement, it was merely a raised brow, while the steely look still remained in his eyes.

  
“I am busy,” he stated simply, and turned his attention back to the stack of papers heaped on his desk, the heap of documents drowning the space until barely any wood was visible. Scraps of paper and books littered the floor, and messy writing scribbled across maps hanging on the wall surprised Mei, as judging from his pristine and polished appearance, she had assumed he was quite orderly, if not a neat freak. But I guess you can never judge someone by their appearance, she thought bitterly. Look how that turned out with China. Foolish girl, she scolded herself, for trusting in someone with your whole heart. He ended up breaking it anyway.

  
Annoyed and slightly ruffled by Honda’s lack of response, Mei cast on last glance over her shoulder before slipping out the door without another word. Perhaps it would’ve been more polite to announce my departure, she thought. But then again, he had shown no acknowledgment of her presence anyway, so she did not feel the need.  
The afternoon glow of the sun sifted through the open windows, allowing a single ray of sunlight to filter through, casting deep, contorted shadows against the screen doors. Mei shivered. Everything about this place seemed to creep with the souls of the lost, and the slightest breath of wind sounded like pained moans and grieving cries, aching over the loss of a loved one.

  
Setting a brisk pace, Mei hurried along the corridor, arms crossed over her chest, hands gripping tightly to her sleeves. It was not long before someone noticed her absence, and a fretful maidservant scurried as quickly as her restraining attire allowed.

  
“Kimonos are so impractical, I don’t understand how you wear them,” Mei commented coldly.

  
The maid, who appeared to be a young girl no older than fourteen, flushed a deep crimson. “Traditional attire is required to work at Honda-sama’s residence,” she looked down shyly at her feet. “Mei-san should get used to them soon. Honda-sama expects you to adapt to our customs very soon,” she added quietly.  
Mei narrowed her eyes. “I’d much rather wear the western clothing than this wretched garment. How does one even run in this?”  
The girl smiled. “There is no need for my lady to ever run, or walk in a fast pace under Honda-sama’s care. He has ensured that we will be of best service to Mei-san. If Mei-san has a wish, then Honda-sama will do his best to grant it, however hard it may be.” She paused, and set hand lightly on Mei’s shoulder. “You are, after all, his most prized possession.”

  
Mei immediately flinched away from her touch.

  
“Possession?” She repeated incredulously. “What does he think I am, a prize he won from China? Is my only purpose to be dangled in front of China like some kind of war trophy?! If he really cares about me so much, then he should let me go home!” Mei stormed off, stumbling ungracefully as she nearly tripped over the long hem of her skirt, a curse escaping under her breath.

  
Startled by Mei’s reaction, the girl hurried to catch up. “Wait! Mei-san, I didn’t mean it like that! I apologize for my lack of consideration!”  
Ignoring her cries, Mei strode ahead, eyes focused on the floor before her, too engaged in her own thoughts to be aware of the advancing figure coming from the opposite side of the hallway; face buried in a book twice the size of his head.

  
“Mei-san, lookout!” The warning was too late, as Mei collided headfirst into a strong, solid chest.

  
The impact of the collision left Mei dazed for a few seconds, as she lay sprawled on the floor awkwardly, her ankle twisted to an unnatural angle under the weight of her body. “Ow,” She groaned, as she slowly came to her senses.

  
Blinking her eyes into focus, she found herself staring at a pair of broad shoulders cloaked under a pure white uniform.  
“If I’m in heaven, why is God wearing a uniform?” Mei moaned. Making an effort to rise, she soon gave up when she lost balance and collapsed, landing painfully on her ankle again.

  
“Mei-san! Let me help you,” the worrisome girl offered at once, rushing to her aid.

  
“I’ll take her,” a familiar voice interrupted. “Bring the medical supplies to her room.” Deep and rich, it seemed to rumble in the speaker’s chest.  
Eyes widening in surprise, the girl stepped back respectfully. “Of course, Honda-sama.”

  
Honda? What is he doing here? Don’t tell me he was the one I walked into!” Mei groaned inwardly, and slapped her arm over her eyes. This was shaping up to be the worst day yet, and considering her current situation, that was saying a lot.

  
Her thoughts were interrupted as a pair of strong arms swept under her body, and lifted her up with ease.

  
“H-hey! Put me down!” Mei exclaimed. “I don’t need help, especially not from you!” Clinging onto her last shred of dignity, Mei refused to put her arms around his neck, instead crossed them in front of her chest protectively.

  
She’s too light, Honda noticed. The kimono seemed to conceal her thin body. Have they been feeding her enough? He reminded himself to have a word with Shouko before bed tonight. The older woman would have more experience in dealing with females.

  
As he carried the girl calmly through the halls, he was well aware of the brown eyes staring intently at his face, scrutinizing his every feature.  
Mei remained silent throughout the agonizingly long journey back to her room, her body tense and rigid. Her heart beat so loud she was sure Honda could feel it thumping in her chest. It was the first time she ever came so close to the Japanese man, and the pure thought of it made her head spin. He’s supposed to be the enemy, why is he being so kind? This isn’t right. He’s not supposed to be like this. This is the man that slaughtered my people and took me away from my home.

  
Mei cast her eyes towards his face, and examined him closely. Jet black bangs skimmed over his forehead, porcelain skin pale and glowing in the fading sunlight. Mild jealousy bubbled in Mei. How is it possible for him to have such good skin? A pert nose and thin lips pursed in a straight line, his expression remained passive. Straight brows framed his eyes, and Mei noticed that they weren’t the obsidian black she had previously thought, but instead a dark, somber brown. The the hostility no longer remained, yet the element of sorrow still lingered in his deep brown orbs.

  
Honda halted in front of a closed screen door that Mei finally recognized as her own. Effortlessly transferring her weight onto one arm, he slid the door open with the other hand. Footsteps barely making a sound on the bamboo flooring, he placed her gently on the spread bed sheets, paying special attention to her swollen ankle. His dark eyes searched her chocolate ones, as if seeking permission. Looking away in embarrassment, Mei nodded her consent as Honda carefully removed her slipper, and rolled her sock off her foot.  
Gentle fingers skimmed along her ankle as he checked for any signs of broken bones, unaware of the relieved sigh he breathed out once he realized it was just a sprain.

  
The contact of his cool fingers against her skin sent shivers down her spine. His touch was surprisingly gentle as he carefully wrapped her ankle and placed the bandaged foot on a small pillow. Mei kept her eyes trained on his face. His brows furrowed in concentration, and his lips were pressed tightly together, forming a straight line. Beads of perspiration shone on his forehead, and she noticed for the first time that his shoulders were stiff with tension. It would not be the first time he had interacted with a woman, as Shouko had once revealed he had a childhood crush. Yet the present whereabouts of the woman was unknown, and since then he had limited himself to only the polite interaction of a greeting, preferring to stay at home while his colleagues took pleasure in visiting brothels.

  
Satisfied with his finished task, he eased her back onto the mat. "You should rest." His voice sounded too loud in the empty room, the sound bouncing off the walls. It seemed to echo through the room until they faded to a low hum in Mei's ears, as she struggled to keep her attention focused on him. Pulling the covers up to her neck, Honda made sure to tuck the edges on the blanket firmly around her body, carefully avoiding contact with her freshly bandaged ankle.

  
"Call Shouko for any assistance." He rose slowly to his feet. "Or me," he added softly, after a moment’s hesitation. "Don't forget, this is your home now." There seemed to be no hint of anger or resentment in his voice, yet as he slipped out the door, Mei noticed the slightest trace of weariness in his steps.

  
The door slid shut, and Mei was left alone to her thoughts. It was barely 6 pm, yet her eyes already felt heavy, and she found it a struggle to keep them open. Perhaps Honda's presence had been soothing. How ironic, the source of her misery for the past months managed to calm her just with the slightest touch. I’m softening up, she scolded herself, before a wave of sleep crashed over her, and her vision went dark.

 

It was only until she awoke the following morning to the chirping of birds by the window, that Mei discovered the single cherry blossom on the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly planned to upload chapter 2 much sooner but I'll just admit I had no idea what to name this chapter so I just pushed it off until I realized I was way behind schedule...So I hereby apologize for my incompetence haha.... I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I would be the happiest person in the world if you were to leave some feedback :)  
> \--kakeinei


	3. No Intention of Finding a Love Interest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which things take a turn into shoūjo shit and Mei is overwhelmed by girl gossip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realize I forgot to update this account after posting this chapter first on my ff.net account?? So sorry guys /// please enjoy this long overdue chapter, and I promise I am working hard on the next one!!

Honda Kiku made sure to effectively drill Japanese influence into Mei. Four hours a day of Japanese, Japanese history and Japanese customs. It was humiliating, she thought, for her native tongue to be written in the same characters, yet spoken with such vile pronunciation. It was completely stripped of its former elegance, contorted into harsh and flat sounds as if the Japanese had a different mouth structure. They probably had different taste buds as well, for Mei could still not fathom how one could drink a tea as bitter as matcha.

A private tutor was arranged, Tanaka-sensei, who was to ensure that Mei adjusted to the Japanese life well. He was an elderly man in his seventies, with forehead creases so deep they were able to squash a mosquito to death, glazed beady eyes, and the few white hairs on his bald head only made him seem more like a lumpy potato sprouting roots. Mei sought pleasure in counting the hairs on his head, as a source of entertainment for the dreadfully long morning hours. Once she had gotten to twenty-three, before the strict man noticed her lack of attention and slapped her wrists with a sharp flick of his stick.

Tanaka-sensei often rambled on during his lectures, and Mei found herself frequently gazing out the window chin rested on her palm, where she had soon mastered the skill of blocking out his croaky voice, and daydreaming about the day she would finally regain her freedom.

During the months that Mei spent cooped up in the Honda residence, she had found a faithful and devoted companion in the servant who had once been the cause of a sprained ankle. Her name was Kaho, and Mei would later discover that the young girl was the niece of the straight faced Shouko.

"Mei-san, tea is served," a tap on the door announced the presence of the young girl. Kaho slid the screen door open, and set a small tray on the table. "I brought you some snacks as well. This time it's mochi." Her pale hands reached across the table and slide the platter before Mei.

The "mochi" was a curious object; small, about half the size of an egg, wrapped in a green leaf with a powdery finish. Mei poked it suspiciously. "Are you sure this is safe?" She brought it to her nose and sniffed it cautiously, coughing as she accidentally inhaled some of the powdery coating.

Kaho smiled, flashing her pearl white teeth. "It's absolutely delicious. I promise you'll like it. Trust me, it's the kids' favorite."

Mei sighed. Giving in to Kaho's persistence, she opened her mouth and nibbled the edge of the dessert. The powder turned out to be flour, and it concealed the sticky consistency that was a mixture between chewy and gooey. Now curious, she took a larger bite. The sweet flavors of the red bean filling burst in her tongue; it was unlike the sickening sweetness of syrup, yet different from the milky rich taste of chocolate either, and she took a sip of the matcha to wash down the sweetness. Her eyes widened as the two flavors mingled together. "A most peculiar combination, matcha and red bead," Mei concluded.

"Does it meet your satisfaction, my lady?" Kaho asked. Her eyes shone brightly, always eager to please the Taiwanese girl.

Mei swirled her tongue around the roof of her mouth, trying to remove the last traces of the sticky mixture. "It is not unpleasant. I don't dislike it," she stated simply.

Knowing her pride, Kaho understood this as a yes. "Actually, there was something else I wanted to talk about." She settled down into a kneeling position, kimono folded neatly under her legs. She clasped her hands together in excitement, and fidgeted in her seat. "The summer fireworks festival is coming up!"

Mei calmly raised an eyebrow. "Firework festival? I've never heard of such a thing." As much as she was interested in the mention of a festival, she still had to remind herself to not become too attached to their customs.

"It happens every year in July!" Kaho bounced ecstatically up and down her knees, revealing the young girl inside her mature composure. "You get to dress up in a pretty yukata and try all the different snacks. Honda-san even lets us take the day off every year." She bent close, thrusting her face right in front of Mei.

"And the best part," she added in a low voice, "is the fireworks." She covered her mouth with a giggle. "They say that if you kiss your crush under the fireworks, you will be blessed as a couple."

Mei leaned away, scrunching up her face in distaste. "I have no intention of finding a love interest." There was no way she could ever fall for a man, much less Japanese. She had so much more to worry about than men. "Kaho, you know I'm not interested in men. I have other things to worry about. Besides," she sighed ruefully, "Honda-san never lets me out of the house anyway."

A grin slowly creeped up Kaho's face. She looked like the cat who had gotten the cream. "That's not entirely true…" she trailed off, and wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

"What do you mean?" Mei narrowed her eyes, her interest sparked. "Don't tell me…"

"Honda-san is taking you to the festival himself! As your personal escort!" Kaho jumped up in glee, all proper manners of a Japanese lady discarded out the window.

"Personal escort? Hold on, I didn't even agree to go to this festival." Mei threw up her arms in confusion. "What am I supposed to wear? What am I even supposed to do?" Mei had no previous experience with men, only the neighborhood boys she grew up with, and who had treated her as a rowdy equal as they chased each other down the streets screaming bloody murder. "I can't spend a whole night with that stone faced Japanese! I can't even bare five minutes in his presence!" Mei groaned and buried her head in her arms. "This is a disaster."

Kaho scooted close to Mei, grasping both of her hands in excitement. "Oh don't you worry! Shouko-san and I have got you all covered! We've arranged for your yukata fitting tomorrow afternoon, and make sure you know everything about the festival so you don't make an utter fool of yourself." She paused. "Not that Mei-san is a fool," she added hastily.

"Did he agree to this or was this all your idea?" Mei was suspicious. It was unlike Honda to plan any special event involving just the two of them, as the serious man had no leisure activities or interests outside of work that Mei had heard of. "It doesn't seem like something he would do."

"Oh Mei-san, I'm afraid your time spent here is still too little to understand Honda-sama. You see, he wasn't always the emotionless man you think he is now." Kaho finally let go of her grip, and Mei breathed out a sigh of relief as she felt the blood rush back into her numb hands. That girl was strong. "Shouko-san mentioned his childhood friend, didn't she?"

Mei nodded, her attention suddenly sparked by the mention of the mysterious girl. "She only said Honda had a childhood friend who disappeared." The no-nonsense woman had briskly waved off her words after realizing she was revealing too many secrets. "Shouko never wastes time in small talk."

"Ah well, my aunt is like that. She's just spent too much time around grouchy old men; I think she's turning into one herself. Actually, I think the other servants are scared of her." Kaho chuckled lightly. "It helps with my reputation. Anyway, as I was saying, Honda-sama was head over heels in love with her from the day they met. It was like love at first sight starting at age four." Kaho sighed dreamily, resting her chin on her palm. "At least that's what my aunt said. I wasn't born at that time yet. Although I've heard the women say that Honda-san was quite the lady magnet when he was young, but he had eyes set on her from the start."

"That loyal, huh," Mei mused. The girl must have either been incredibly attractive, or had some god given super power to be able to steal such a cold heart. "What was her name?"

Kaho paused. "Akane. It means deep red." She sucked in a breath. "But you must never mention her name in his presence. Honda-san will…be upset." Kaho glanced sheepishly at Mei. "I wasn't supposed to tell you all this, but I thought that you would be the only person to warm up Honda-sama, even if just a little. You may not notice, but he treats you better than he treats anyone else. So please, on my – our – behalf" she corrected herself, "Please accompany him to the festival. You're the only person who he will listen to."

Mei blinked slowly, and her gaze wandered around the room as she pondered over what Kaho had just revealed. So no one is immune to heartbreak. Honda and I, we're in a similar situation, she realized. She shook her head quickly, to rid herself of those thoughts. Now wasn't the time to pity him. She cast Kaho a sidelong glance, only to regret it instantly, for the young girl was begging her with those wide eyes. "That's cheating," Mei protested, giving in to the irresistibly innocent gaze. "Alright." She sighed. "I will go." Kaho's eyes immediately lit up, and she let out a squeal of joy. "But just this once," Mei added sternly. "And don't use those puppy eyes on me again, that's cheating."

"Thank you so much! I'll make sure you won't regret this Mei-san. Oh, there's so much to plan! Thank goodness the tailor's coming in tomorrow, but let's see, we still need to fix your hair and makeup, and teach you the proper manners…Mei-san, make sure you pay attention to Tanaka-sensei these days, you never know what subject Honda-sama will bring up."

Mei rubbed the back of her head, wondering just what kind of trouble she had brought upon herself. It was going to be a long week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So a lot of stuff has been going on lately: 
> 
> 1) I'm in Taiwan!!  
> 2) the main reason being my grandfather passed away so the whole family's back to settle some business ;(  
> 3) the good thing being that I can draw inspiration from some sights and museums I'll be visiting and hopefully get some new ideas 
> 
> So until next time, and please stay with me till then!! 
> 
> Much love,  
> kakeinei <3


	4. Dress-up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Mei is dolled up and Shouko's ice cold heart melts a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's a bit shorter than usual, but I promise something good is happening soon!

"Stop fidgeting, I'm not done yet!" A pale hand slapped Mei's fingers, who was patting blindly at her hair. 

"How long until it's ready? We've been at this for hours," Mei complained. Her handmaidens Shouko and Kaho had strode in that morning in all their Japanese glory, with an armful of fabric and accessories, mumbling through a mouthful of pins that today was the big day and they were here to help Mei get ready for her first festival. 

She craned her neck, desperate to get a glance in the mirror, earning another pinch from Shouko. 

"Hold still! You're worse than a country lad getting fitted for his first western suit!" The strict and orderly woman chided while bustling about the room, picking scraps of fabric off the floor and dusting them before placing them beside her little dressing table set up in the corner of the room. Mei's quarters had transformed into fitting room almost overnight, with a full length mirror and screen diving the space, hiding the three women from sight if one were to enter the room. 

Once she finished tidying her surroundings, Shouko hurriedly resumed to her task of final adjustments of Mei's yukata, sticking pins here and there, never forgetting to insert a few remarks about her physique. "Suck in that tum — you're too thin! Have you not been eating your meals? If you don't eat, Honda-sama will be upset!" She smoothed the collar. "Chin up, shoulder back! You are a proper Japanese lady now, so you might as well start acting like one already. Honda-sama has been far too generous and understanding with your behavior." 

Kaho, busying herself with Mei's hair, shot a sympathetic glance in her direction. As her niece, Kaho had first hand experience with her aunt's no-nonsense attitude, but had long since acquired the immunity to her fussing and fretful manner. She ran a comb through Mei's long locks, admiring the natural shine returning to her glossy hair. "Look on the bright side Oba-san, Mei's hair is healthy again." 

"Humph". With a slight grunt under her breath, Shouka cast her scrutinizing stare over Mei's head, inspecting every feature of her upper body. "Take out the plum blossoms. This is an important event with Honda-sama, you need to show your respect." 

Before Mei could protest, Shouko's swift hands plucked the flowers from her hair and swept them away from her grasp. 

"Shouko please, let me keep them! They're the only thing giving me comfort right now and I need them for encouragement, especially tonight." Mei desperately grabbed onto Shouko's sleeve, and glanced at Kaho for help, who only shook her head helplessly. 

"Hush! I will not tolerate such disrespectful behavior on this big night. Now, it is very important that you remember all manners Tanaka-sensei taught you and behave yourself. I will not be pleased if I hear of any complaints from Honda-san. He has waited very long for this day." Shouko spun around from the pleading girl and motioned to Kaho, as if reminding her of something. Understanding the signal, Kaho fumbled through one of the drawers and handed Mei something folded neatly into a square.

"This is for you, Mei-san. Shouko and I made it for you." She hid smirk under her hand. "Oba-san's just too embarrassed to present it to you personally. We spent hours on this little thing." 

Mei extended her arms to receive the little bundle, and marveled at the gift in her palms. It was a dainty little handkerchief, made of a pale creamy white fabric and stitched with little pink petals that Mei took to be plum blossoms. "It's beautiful," she breathed out. 

"Oh! There's more to it, look closely, on the right corner." Kaho peered over her shoulder. 

Mei squinted and held the cloth close to her face. Sure enough, barely visible in the right corner, the Chinese character for plum blossom was carefully embroidered. Eyes brimming with tears, Mei smiled, touched by their little act of kindness. "Thank you both so much. I'll keep it with me at all times." She carefully tucked it into the folds of her yukata, suddenly appreciative of the complicated garment. 

"Ah, silly girl, your tears will ruin the makeup!" Shouko said gruffly. The usual sharpness still remained in her tone, yet Mei could see the small glimmer of pride in her eyes as she tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear, flustered by the show of gratitude. 

"We wanted to give you something to show our gratitude to you, since you agreed to attend the festival with Honda-sama. We're really hoping that this will be a chance for him to relax and enjoy himself, even for just a night." Kaho smiled ruefully. "Oba-san really misses the old Honda-sama before the war, especially when he was a little boy." She laughed lightly. "She even said she'd rather change his diaper again than see him with that permanent frown on his face!" 

Once again, the topic of Honda-san's past self was brought to light. Mei wondered for the hundredth time when the mysterious Japanese man would return to his former self, if ever. It seemed that the only time she was able to catch a glimpse was when he rode through the front door on his horse, with weary soldiers trudging after him, stumbling past Mei's window.

They never exchanged words; in fact, the only acknowledgement Honda ever gave to her was a brief nod every now and then, and he never made direct eye contact. He seemed to purposely avoid her, only sending Shouko to give the daily report. Mei was curious as to why he would lock her in his residence, yet ignore her presence. 

Maybe Shouko was right; war does change people. It tears the humanity and emotion away, and manipulates them into something terrible and cruel, far worse from the unspoken actions on the battlefield. Betrayal, deception, indifference, depression; those were all the after affects and consequences one must pay of destroying their own kind. It made sense, if you thought about it. Exchanging safety, peace, and happiness for more land, money and power, only to gain less of the bargain and more of the bad, tainted by their own immorality of greed. 

"Mei!" A gentle shake of Mei's shoulders jolted her from her thoughts. "Are you listening?" Kaho asked. "We said you can look in the mirror now." 

"Sorry, I was just thinking of something." Mei apologized bashfully, embarrassed to be caught spacing out. 

Shouko helped her to her feet, while Kaho pushed away the screen divider revealing the mirror. 

Mei gasped. Instead of the skinny small framed girl she was used to seeing, the girl in the mirror was everything she had longed to be. Feminine, elegant, and dare she say beautiful, the figure in mirror was not a girl, but a woman. 

Her long luscious locks had been combed back and piled atop her head, with loose strands framing her face. Red lips and rosy cheeks, Mei's makeup transformed her into a porcelain doll. Her usual pale pink kimono had been replaced with a beautiful yukata. Snow white fabric with a splash of light pink on the edge of the skirt, her yukata was the definition of elegance. Cherry blossoms decorated the garment here and there, and of course the look would not have been complete without the pink and gold sash, or obi, as Shouko had called it. 

Mei stared at her reflection awestruck. "I'm..."

"Beautiful." Kaho finished for her. The young Japanese girl stood by her side with her hands clasped together in front of her chest. "This yukata suits you perfectly. Honda-sama does have a keen eye in fashion. I'm surprised he knows so much about women's clothing." 

"Honda-sama used to ask me for advice when sending gifts to Akane-chan," Shouko added. "I'm glad to see he has improved in his taste in fashion. I remember the first gift he sent to her was a ghastly red shawl he had imported specially from Europe. He insisted that it would be fitting for Akane-chan due to her namesake, despite my warning that it would not look good on her pale complexion. Stubborn as he was, the boy proudly presented it to her." She smiled fondly at the memory. 

"Did Akane-san like it?" Mei asked curiously. She couldn't imagine anyone with the graciousness to accept such a gift and have the nerve to wear it. 

"Oh of course she did, although it was out of kindness and thoughtfulness of Honda-sama. The girl was too kind to wound his pride." Shouko shook her head. "After that, the boy got it in his head that he had a good taste in women's fashion. It was quite disastrous for poor Akane-chan." 

It seemed that whenever Shouko spoke, Akane would always be mentioned. The girl must have been an important member of the household, to have such a lasting impact. Mei wondered if anyone would ever remember her the same way. It seemed that the only one who truly showed her kindness was Kaho, and even she had moments when loyalty to her master was greater than her friendship with Mei. 

Kaho let out a short laugh. "Well I'm glad Honda-sama has changed since then. I'm sure Oba-san wouldn't have let you out in anything less than what you're wearing now." She sighed dreamily. "What a couple you two will make, walking down the streets. I can just imagine the looks on everyone's faces, they'll be burning with jealousy!" 

Mei rolled her eyes and shoved her playfully. "It's not even a date, I'm just accompanying him to the festival. And remember, I'm doing this for you, not him." 

Just as Kaho was about to open her mouth for another tease, Shouko interrupted their little game. "It's getting late now, Honda-sama should be there soon. If we don't hurry, we'll be late. You don't want to keep him waiting for long." 

As Shouko slid open the screen door, Mei gave the plum blossoms resting on the dresser one last glance, before taking a deep breath and stepping out the door. *Jia You, she encouraged herself. You can do this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Jia You - Chinese for "do your best/good luck" usually said to show support (kind of like the equivalent of "ganbatte" in Japanese) 
> 
> A big thank you to everyone who read this story and has followed me up to now... I know I'm not the best when it comes to updating but I'm trying my best to squeeze in a few more chapters before school starts!! I'm working hard on the following chapters so please stay tuned for more, and as usual, comments and feedback are very much appreciated!! 
> 
> xxx,  
> kakeinei

**Author's Note:**

> This is set somewhere during the time period after 1895 when Taiwan was under Japanese rule...Since my family is of Taiwanese descent, I felt the need to contribute to this tiny but strong fandom. I will try my best to integrate some aspects of the time period, but I apologize for any historical inaccuracy (although I do like to think I am quite knowledgeable on Taiwanese history) Updates will try to be once a month, but since it's summer, maybe I'll find sometime to squeeze in a little extra. Please review/leave a comment if you enjoyed it and want more!! : )


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